digressica.com

This year I have witnessed my adored friend LC achieve record levels of happiness, effectiveness and personal Zen. And she wasn’t too shabby to begin with.

LC attributes much of this to a course she took earlier in the year called the Landmark Forum. I can’t say I fully understand the concept, but I’ve done some research and I can tell you the following:

a) Some people call it a cult
b) Some people call it a con
c) Some people call it life-changing
d) LC has never seemed saner to me.

So partly out of curiosity, and partly out of the hope that the forum will have the same neurosis-vanquishing (or at least neurosis-taming) effect on me, I’ve signed up to this (rather expensive) ultimate-transformation-in-a-weekend myself.

Next Friday I’m off to a white-walled office block in Euston to sit in a room with around 100 other self-regarding Londoners who also have too much time and too much money. Possibly to be brainwashed. Possibly to become Digressica 2.0: stronger, faster, better, less annoying.

For just £345 and around 40 hours of my life.

I know it sounds like I’m not into the idea at all, but actually this cynical veneer is more to do with self-preservation than any actual doubts I may have about the merits of the forum. To be honest, if I hadn’t seen a change in LC myself, and if I didn’t know that she’s a clever kitten who’s unlikely to be duped by a well-executed marketing strategy (as she works in marketing, she’s usually the one doing the duping), I wouldn’t have signed up and forked over a chunk of Great British Pounds that could probably buy me a three-bedroom apartment back home in Australia.

But that doesn’t mean I have naive expectations of shedding my obnoxious, self-centred, lazy, commitment-phobic caterpillar skin and becoming a poised, prolific, super confident butterfly. I’m maintaining a healthy level of scepticism about the whole thing, which made it more enjoyable to have this telephone conversation with the guy from Landmark Education who signed me up today.

“So, what made you sign up for the Landmark Forum? What do you want to change in your life?”

“Oh, um… I guess I hadn’t thought about it in great detail.”

“Just broadly though…”

“Just broadly… I guess… um…”

“Improve your career? Relationships?”

“Yeah, that sounds right – career, relationships… productivity…”

“Right. Okay. Good. Career, relationships, productivity. What else?”

“Oh… well it’s mostly just those things.”

“Okay, okay, good. So, aside from career, relationships and productivity, what would you like to get out of the forum?”

“Um… no, it’s still just those things.”

“Okay. Good. And is there anything else apart from productivity, relationships and career?”

“Nope. Just those. But thanks.”

“Great, great. Yeah. Okay, so aside from career, productivity and relationships, have you thought about what else you’d like to get out of the forum?”

“No.”

“Great, great. Okay, so – “

“No.”

“Great.”

I’ll let you know how this thing pans out.